By Barbara Dickinson

If you would like to listen to the audio version of this blog, you can find it on YouTube.

Before we begin, it is a great pleasure to mention here a new addition to our Blog Team - Bruce Nayowith! Check out his blog posts on “Accelerated Group Learning Through Felt Sensing” and “Focusing Happens” on our Blog Page.

For some of us, growing up featured messages like, “Don’t toot your own horn!” or “Better to be seen, but not heard.” or “You’re making a fuss over nothing.” And then, as adults, we get to the world of work and find out we had better be able to account for our “accomplishments” if we want to get ahead.

Another thing I noticed when I am interacting with other people is how I feel about myself. If I am feeling good about myself, my interactions with other people tend to go well… at least from my side. When I am feeling low about myself, my interactions with other people tend to reflect that.

All this leads to a discussion of accomplishments, how to track them, how to celebrate them, how to use them to boost self esteem, and how to recognize in them the positive impact we have on others.

Here we are, having completed the first quarter of 2025. A few questions for you: 

• Did you make New Year Resolutions? 

• How is that going?

• Did you make a plan for the year?

• How far along are you with that plan?

• Do you have a list of your heart’s desires to be realized this year?

• How many of those are in your life already?

If you are not satisfied with the answer to any of these questions, you might like to read on  about the importance of accounting for accomplishments. Resolutions, plans, and even wishes need a strong foundation of belief in our ability to accomplish what is before us. In this blog post, you will find the story of the author’s experience and a preview of a helpful resource.

Some years ago I was not feeling so good about myself because I believed I was not accomplishing enough. At the time, a mentor of mine sat down with me to figure out this whole thing about accomplishments. He started by asking me questions that quickly became annoying to me because they seemed so simple and obvious.

• Did you pay all your bills this year? Yes!

• Did you have your health check ups? Yes.

• Were you sober? Yes.

• Did you take any illegal drugs? No!

• Did you maintain your home? Yes.

• Did you contribute to any worthy causes? Yes.

He knew exactly when to pause because these questions were becoming irritating to me!

Then he started down a similar path regarding my children.

• Did your children take any illegal drugs this year? No. 

• Did your children go to school this year and do their homework and pass their classes? Yes!

• Did you take your children to regular health check ups? Yes.

You get the idea!

At the point when I was about to express my annoyance, he stopped. And then he said words that changed my life forever: "Do you realize how many people cannot say what you just said?"

He pointed out to me that these were monumental accomplishments in the world in which we live. To be steadfast, responsible, and caring were all accomplishments.

We went on to look at the rest of what I had done with my year from the perspective of outcomes. What had I improved? What had I eliminated that was wasteful? What had I created that was new? And so on.

He urged me to write down all of it, including household, family and personal accomplishments.

It has been about 20 years since I started doing this and I do it every year. It helps to ground me when I need to do something hard, when I am faced with tragedy, or when my interactions do not go as well as I wish they would.

Along the way I have collected some tips for remembering my accomplishments. I would like to invite you to check out the forthcoming mini-course that we have created at LearnFocusing.org to help you deepen and broaden your accounting of your own accomplishments. There you will find much more on this topic, including a discussion of the role of bucket lists, wish lists, resolutions, and more.

Sandy Jahmi Burg has been so generous with “real estate” for my work on Interactive Focusing, that I have made this mini-course a product for sale in her store at a modest cost. I hope you will consider making a purchase to support LearnFocusing.org.

Seen on a Road Sign

Coming soon! Our mini-course on Accomplishments will be released by the end of May 2025. Priced very reasonably, the course comes with a video, a supplemental article, and a handout, so that you can access the mini-course at your convenience. We are delighted to make this available to you and at the same time support the work of LearnFocusing, bringing Focusing to more people every year, especially educators.

Learning Opportunities

• You can find our 2025 course schedule HERE. 

• We offer a 15 month Focusing skills training for beginners called Creating Space for Lasting Change.  

• Here are Sandy Jahmi Burg's LearnFocusing.org Classes

• As we are on Eastern New York time, you can find similar times to those we offer for the Changes meetings.

Questions? 

If any of this prompts a question or a comment, we would love to hear from you. Use our Contact Form at the bottom of the page to reach out.

Until next time!

• Our Monthly Virtual Changes Meeting for Exploring Interaction Schedule and Registration is here. 

• Watch our Demonstration of Interactive Focusing with Sandy and Barbara here.

• Read more about Exploring Interaction here. 

• Resources about Interactive Focusing are found here.

• You can read the latest from Sandy about Smartview Conversations here

• Read Sandy’s latest blog post on “How Does Focusing Lead to Action” here.