One of the gifts of Focusing is to be truly heard by another person. In this blog post, we talk about the conversational habit of responding to another person with our own stories, feelings, or reactions, and how Focusing helps us become better listeners. Asking, or reflecting, with empathy can bring us into a better relationship with the other. Read on!

Conflict! It is a part of everyday living. Most people do not love it. Many people are afraid of it. Some people have skills to process conflict successfully -- meaning the relationship between the two people in conflict survives and thrives. Many people have weak skills and suffer broken relationships after conflict. 

We interrupt our regular blog posts on exploring interaction for a special announcement! “Sundays with Gene - A Memoir” by Barbara Dickinson is now available right here on the LearnFocusing.org website.

How is all this about exploring interaction, you might ask? And I would answer that travel, in particular, brings me into contact with many more people than I usually encounter in my everyday life. The opportunities over the last few weeks for exploring interaction with all manner of strangers, and some friends, were abundant. 

At last, here we are with a full description of an Interactive Focusing session in 10 blog posts. The Developers called it the “Double Wing” of Interactive Focusing, where each of two partners has a complete turn. The 10 blog posts follow an outline for a series of Lessons on Interactive Focusing, showing you how the full Double Wing unfolds. Scroll to the bottom of this post for a list of the Lessons by date of the post. 

We are close to having the complete description of an Interactive Focusing session. In this post we are looking at the Relationship Check, which is the last feature. Next time, we will put everything together to give you a detailed description of the entire process, including examples and exercises, in just 9 blog posts.

This Week we are going to look at the next unique feature of relating with Interactive Focusing, the Interactive Response, where the Listener becomes the second Focuser and asks inside, “What touched me about the story of the first Focuser?”. 

Focuser as Teacher means that the Focuser lets the Listener know how they would like to proceed. For instance, would they like a "Lead In" (or attunement, as some call it)? How would they like to be heard, reflected? Would they like any suggestions or guidance? And so forth. The Focuser “teaches” the Listener what they prefer, what works best for them.

For so many, there may be no holiday celebrations, only loneliness, fear, isolation, even hunger, danger, and loss. Here, we are embarking on an exploration of interaction -- relationships between people. And one of the things we hope is that these explorations might help us strengthen our skills in getting along, in pursuing peace.